Why Can't I Let Someone Help ME?

So I have realized this week I need help every once in a while. Despite my declarations of independence earlier this week. . .I needed someone this week. I needed someone to take care of me. It has undoubtedly been a disasterous couple of weeks for me. I have in the last 3 weeks had a string of disasters both minor and major: my grandmother passed away, my friend's stepfather passed away, my wallet was stolen, and I didn't get the job I wanted and unfortunately had gotten my heart set on. I feel beaten and tired.

My only saving grace has come in the form of a guy who has stepped up to take care of me despite only having known me for a week. I can't express how thankful I am for him or even understand why anyone would go to such great lengths for someone they don't really even know. He not only has taken care of me in ways I can't express he has done so gracefully and cheerfully. He has let me cry and given me space to talk and be myself away from the weight of my problems.

I have also been taken aback by my own resistance to being taken care of. I guess I just don't want to admit that I need help. Or that I can't do it on my own. What I don't know is why that admission is so scary. Perhaps this is the point I have needed to get to in order to get myself to let go and really let someone in. . .Why must personal growth be so painful? Or perhaps I am afraid that letting someone see that weekness will only make me that much more vulnerable.