The Funny Thing About Relationships

The thing I find oddest about relationships is all the things we don't say about them. Often we look at the relationship of our friends, family, and loved ones and know from the outside if they are good, bad, disfunctional, limping along, or a disaster waiting to happen. From the outside we often see the things that are wrong that the people in them are too close to see.

We have all been to weddings we knew were a bad idea. Yet we never say anything. We suspect . . .We talk. . .We worry . . .But we don't speak. We see the cracks but fear alienating those we love. BUT WHY?? Wouldn't we be better friends/relatives ect. If we spoke up about our concerns in the hope they might help. No because we don't want to meddle.

So what do we do. . .We hope they know/see something we don't. I guess I am right now hoping for the best in several situations. I guess all I can do is hope I am wrong.

Preparing for Las Vegas

So I took the job in Las Vegas and now I am overwhelmed with the idea of moving all the way across the county. Somehow the task just seems huge. I know for a 29 year old I really don't have that much stuff . . . Most of my worldly possessions fit in my closet. I am beginning to sift through my belongings, round up boxes and prepare mentally for that long journey west.

I know some of the this trepidation comes from fear of change and the idea of starting in a new place with no friends and no idea how to get anywhere. The last time I did that was when I moved to Tallahassee to start graduate school. I have become so comfortable here and in many ways this is really the closest thing to home I have felt since I left my parents home almost 10 years ago. I will miss school. I will miss my friends. I will miss all the odd things that make Tallahassee oddly entertaining. All the while I am looking forward to a fresh start and a new place.

I also think these big life changes are a little harder on us single people. (Yes, I know the decisions with two people are harder as are setting the priorities). I have no one to hold my hand and tell me everything will be O. K. I have no one who will be there when I get home to keep me company and make me smile before I make new friends. I have no one to calm me down from the sticker shock of house hunting and make me feel as though it is ok to spend this much money on a condo.

All this makes me wish more than ever that I had found that somebody a long time ago . . . And that they were here to help me through the hard times. I have to believe for my own sanity that I haven't passed him up yet and that he will have been worth all the wait.